By Katie Azevedo, M.Ed.
“Nobody does that.”
That’s what many students say at the start of work together. When I start talking about managing homework outside of Google Classroom, taking notes in class, and starting study sessions days before the test instead of the night before, without fail… I hear it: “Nobody does that,” they say.
Joke’s on them. Yes, people do that. They’re just not talking about it.
I’ve been coaching teens and young adults for over twenty years. I’ve personally coached over 3,000 of them in a one-to-one capacity. And what I’ve seen over and over again is this:
The kids who seem to effortlessly get good grades are not doing what you think they’re doing.
In other words, the ones who walk into class looking completely unbothered, who never seem stressed before tests, and who somehow always know the answers, are not telling you something.
These students are not naturally smarter than you. They are not operating on some different intellectual frequency that you don’t have access to. And they’re not as nonchalant as you think they are.
They’re actually working really, really hard behind the scenes, where you can’t see it.
Why You Think the “Naturally Smart” Kids Don’t Have to Work For It
We live in a strange little world now where “nonchalance” is cooler than effort. Therefore, nobody’s talking about effort anymore. But that doesn’t mean the effort isn’t happening.
However, the kids with the highest grades and the least amount of obvious school drama are efforting quite hard, but they’re simply not talking about it.
What do I mean?
When students with high grades and low stress appear super chill about school (or just naturally smart and don’t have to work for it), one of two things is usually happening:
- They’re using a whole bunch of learning strategies throughout the week that they’re not even aware they’re using (this was me in high school); these kids don’t talk about their strategies because they don’t even know they’re strategies
- They’re consciously using a bunch of learning strategies behind the scenes, but intentionally don’t share this information with others
Regardless of which one is happening – number one or two above – you don’t see the full picture.
Top performing students (who still look chill) aren’t going on their Instagram stories to show you the two hours they spent on Sunday making study guides.
They’re not Snapping (do we say Snapping? Snap Chatting? I have no idea…but you know what I mean) about how they went back through their notes the same night they took them to make sure everything made sense before they forgot it all.
They’re not talking about how they actually read the book they were supposed to read for English class instead of AI-ing it.
Again, there are two kinds of successful students, which I detailed above, and also here:
- They don’t intentionally hide this information; they just don’t think about sharing it.
- They intentionally don’t share this information in order to keep up a certain persona.
When all you see is these kids’ good grades, and you don’t see the strategies and effort they put into them, you get the false idea that they’re just lucky and that strategies don’t work.
Or, worse yet, that “nobody does that.”
What Students With Good Grades (Who Also Look Chill) Are Really Doing
You’ve essentially been seeing a completely distorted picture of what academic success actually requires — and then you’re left wondering why you’re struggling. The reality is that you’re not doing the things required to get good grades without losing your mind. But nobody has told you what these things are.
Top-performing, chill students do a lot of work behind the scenes. I share some of what that is in the list below. However, it’s important to know that although the list may look intimidating, the effort required to do everything in it is probably less effort than what you’ve been doing.
Most students look for every shortcut under the sun to avoid doing the real work. But the joke is that all the shortcuts lead to MORE drama and WORSE grades.
Example:
Student A: doesn’t read the book for English class. They think they’re beating the system by using AI to get a summary of the book. Then an essay is assigned and they panic. They realize they actually need information from the book to write the essay, get a bad essay grade, and freak out the whole time.
Student B: reads the book for English class, writes the essay based on the book, and gets a good grade. No drama.
Don’t be Student A.
Okay, here’s what top-performing, chill students (Student B) are doing behind the scenes, but just not talking about:
- Taking notes in class
- Studying using real active recall methods (yes, this is more uncomfortable, but top students don’t freak out at discomfort)
- Paying attention in class
- Learning the material gradually throughout a unit (by reviewing notes, reviewing class materials, etc.)
- Doing homework problems to learn the material, not just to get the answer
- Doing the assigned readings, including books
- Studying without distractions (this means they can study less)
- Caring if they understand the material, and checking their comprehension along the way
- Studying earlier than a cram session the night before the test
- Figuring out things that they don’t understand
- Thinking about the material even when they don’t have to
- Starting assignments early, or at least when they’re assigned (instead of procrastinating)
- Managing their assignments outside of the school portal (because the portal was designed for teachers, not students)
- Not using AI to do their work, only to explain concepts
Proof That Top Students Are Doing Things Behind the Scenes That You Don’t Know About
I’m going to share a story about two students I work with in my private practice. I won’t use their real names. I’ll call them Tom and Jerry.
The funny thing is that the two students don’t even know this story, even though I want to tell them so badly. That will make sense after you hear the story.
Tom and Jerry go to the same school and play on the same hockey team. They’re also in the same social circle.
The key: Tom doesn’t know Jerry works with me. Jerry doesn’t know that Tom works with me.
Tom is excelling academically, but on the outside, he appears nonchalant about school. He’s very coachable and open to all the strategies I teach.
Jerry is really struggling in school. He’s also pretty resistant to changing his approach.
Jerry (the struggling one) told me recently that he didn’t see the point in doing all the things I was asking him to do. (Shocker, I know.) And then he used his teammate as evidence.
I’m paraphrasing, but basically, Jerry said something like, “Nobody does stuff like that. Nobody takes notes/studies this early/whatever. There’s a kid on my hockey team who doesn’t even study. He’s just naturally smart. He doesn’t do any of this.”
But remember: I work with Tom, but Jerry doesn’t know that.
I know exactly what Tom is doing behind the scenes. I know how hard he’s working. I know the systems he has in place (because I taught him). I know how much he cares about learning the material instead of just getting the answer through AI.
I know that what looks effortless from the outside is anything but.
But Jerry has no idea what Tom is doing, because like most kids who appear “naturally smart,” Tom isn’t announcing to the world what he’s doing.
There’s a persona to maintain. There’s a social dynamic at play. There are optics and cool factors and whatever else you want to call it. The “too cool for school” syndrome is a good one.
So struggling Jerry looks at the excelling Tom and sees nonchalance and ease, and then he uses that as proof that the strategies I’m asking him to try are unnecessary.
Meanwhile the kid he’s pointing to as proof is doing every single thing I’m describing.
What You Need to Do to Become a Nonchalant Student Who Still Gets Good Grades
When I teach students what it actually takes to learn material — useful note-taking, active study methods, time and task management that exists in external systems — the most common response is resistance, followed closely by the claim that nobody does this.
Oh, but my friends…THEY DO.
The students you think have it easy are not coasting like you think they are. They’re just not showing you their work or talking about it or making it a “big deal” to the world.
Some students intentionally hide their efforts so they can maintain a certain reputation.
Others don’t think to share them because their strategies are so baked into their daily operations that they’re not even aware that others don’t do what they’re doing.
The sooner you stop believing that “naturally smart” kids get good grades because they’re naturally smart, the sooner your own results start looking more like theirs.
If you want to learn exactly what those students are doing behind the scenes — the systems, study methods, time and task management strategies, organization hacks, and the note-taking secrets — that’s exactly what I teach inside SchoolHabits University. The link to learn more and join me is below.
